Damn. Doesn’t it suck when the young ones turn out to be more Brat Pack than Rat Pack? Is this like when Rob Lowe got caught with the hooker, or is it like RDJ sucking back speedballs?

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“Jacksonville Jaguars rookie Justin Blackmon arrested for DUI,” ESPN (June 3, 2012)

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Well, it’s neither. It’s a DUI. It’s a terrible charge, a criminal one, and a taboo. Drunk drivers are being pushed further and further out of society, but at least Justin Blackmon decided to do it early in his career. Now, he has enough time to turn the Jacksonville Jaguars’ offence around and to hopefully push Sunday’s news to the bottom of his Wikipedia page.

After the career we all have planned for him, this DUI will be a blip on the rader, a speed bump in the mirror, and a one-night stand with your brother’s girlfriend that you’ll never tell him about.

Or, is that getting off-track a bit?